Anxiously waiting

Anxiously and frequently throughout the day I check my email and blog to see if someone, anyone, has posted a comment yet. Some glimmer that what I have written has been deemed acceptable. In a sense I suppose that I am searching for a personal validation (a pat on the back, if you will) that my thoughts are of value.

Then I find that I must stop and re-examine my motives. Why did I start writing this blog anyway? Was it for gratuitous flattery from others to boost my own pitiful ego? Or, was it a means to get me writing again after an almost 2-year hiatus? In many ways I think it is a combination of both. Shallow as it may be - I still possess a basic human craving to know that what I do, and what I say, has value in another's eyes.

For my inner, higher, more altruistic self - such feedback holds no real meaning. But I must confess that at this point of development in my life, I am a bit more egocentric than that. Please do not take this the wrong way - I am not begging for praise. It is quite obvious that my blog postings are of great quality and can fully stand on their own (wink wink).

However, should you be so inclined.....